Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Mall a Mall - the social revolution

Recently I met a friend whose mom had developed the cramped funnelsyndrome. It was due to the constant stretching of arms to reach the product with the largest discount in malls. Another friends mom was turning into a discomaniac. She kept buying the best deals products even though she didnt need them. Some women have been recommended by their doctors to inhale the mall air everyday through an evening mall walk to ensure good health(of their spouses perhaps?). But the other key trend is that men have been able to play the much touted role reversal with greater finesse due to these malls. Hence this has increased the depression of women further since one of their pet peeves has been tackled. In fact some men are so happy to do housework nowadays as they dont have to haggle for the extra dhaniya with the bhajiwala. This is the silent social revolution malls sweeping across the country. As malls evolve men will flaunt their trolleys to attract the opposite sex just like a peacock displays its feathers.

But malls can do lot more to get up the social agenda. First they can reserve some days for specific communities. Gujjus will need 3 days since they consume 40% of GDP, Punjabis 2 days and South Indians 1 day, Sunday would be cosmopolitan. There will be complex algorithms that will predict the inventory to be stocked and discounts to be given. Plus there will be full-time dating and marriage services running. Like the popular speed-dating program, a gal and boy of the same community would be given a shopping trolley each and 30 mins to shop. Statistically, shopping habits are the best indicators of pedigree,fit and outlook in life. And the crowds would provide enough moments to sample chemistry. Plus the gal can see the number of credit cards the guy has for a secure indebted future. At the end the couple can decide whether they want to go ahead with the relationship or not. Marriages can be made in heaven, but for a taste of reality after marriage, what better than a mall.

This phenomenon has now spread to the TV channels, the last to grasp anysocial revolution. True to their tribe, they are now planning a reality show based on shopping. Kaun banega trolleypati,anyone ?


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